Sunday, October 11, 2009

Victory Is Mine!


This is the day! I have scored a victory for all mankind. It's true. I found a sock previously thought to have been eaten by the washer. Before the adulation starts and product endorsements start to roll in let me tell you the whole fascinating story. Put your flashback shoes on... we're going in!

On a black day two years ago I lost a sock in the wash. It was a black sock. Winter weight. I liked that pair of socks. They were toasty. I had never lost a sock before. I just don't lose things. True. It doesn't happen. Maybe I took the loss harder than I should of for that reason, but I have to say the loss of that sock embittered me.

I kept the now pairless sock. It was a futile gesture to hope but I kept it anyway. I moved on, but I never forgot. Evey once in a while over the past two years I would come across the widow sock and sigh. Some times I would wonder if I should throw it away, but I never did. Thus the years whiled away.

Until!!! Yes until today! I found the missing sock. Oh happy day. That pair of socks is no longer lost to me. I was looking through dresser drawers for anything I hadn't worn lately and wasn't likely to wear to donate to charity. Well my goodness was rewarded. There underneath a gray turtleneck was...the sock! How I smiled. Delight washed over me like chocolate over the creamy mint of a York Peppermint Patty.

Have I solved the riddle of the missing sock? The sock that so many of us assume the washer ate? Am I the sock Darwin of my age? I'd like to think that all of the missing socks of the world are really just relaxing with a T-shirt or chilling with the bottoms of your flannel jammies। They aren't lost. They are vacationing.

Ready to have an elementary school names after me,


P.S. the photo is from The Morgue File and was taken by gregparis

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